The DJ's
Peabody
Pop quiz punk! You meet Rick Astley in a dark alleyway, what do you do?
That raises an interesting question… What, exactly, is Rick Astley doing in a dark alleyway? Hmmm. Most likely digging through garbage cans, I would assume. After all, the old career ain’t what it used to be. And, if someone like myself met Rick Astley in that dark alleyway, I’m sure he would ask to borrow a dollar. I would simply tell him no. He would probably turn around and sadly walk away, in a dejected manner. That would be that. But of course I couldn’t leave it at that. And that’s where the trouble begins. With a smirk, I would call out, “
You have the choice between spending the day at
Strip clubs suck during the day, because most all of the strippers are out at lucky peak. So
You are stuck on an island what three items do you need to survive?
A roll of duct tape, a shotgun, and a George Foreman Grill are all I need to survive. Really.
In 5 years what do you hope to be doing?
I secretly hope to be ruling and mercilessly oppressing the people of a small third world nation, in 5 years. Unfortunately, I am a realist. And due to the fact that I lack any ambition at all whatsoever, I realize that I will likely be working the same crap job and getting yelled at by management- just like I am now. But, suppose I get fired within 5 years… (Keep in mind, I am a realist) …I then hope to be working at a jelly bean factory, where I will make delicious colorful jelly bean candies that everyone will love, young and old alike!
OK, now rep yo city!
What is your Hobo name?
Hank Rutherford Lipschitz III
If you could get lit up with any historical figure who would it be?
JFK. I would tell him to pay no mind to the man shooting at him from the window, and keep an eye on the grassy knoll. That’s where the action is.
What’s the one question we shouldn’t ask you?
Where I buried the bodies. If I told you, I’m afraid you’d have to join them.
Top 5:
Bands:
The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Tool, Incubus, Nine Inch Nails, and Phil Collins. Oh yes, Phil Collins is a badass. Especially when he was with Genesis. He rocked way more than Peter Gabriel, even though he’s like 2 ½ feet shorter. I even like the creepy claymation music video for the original “
Movies
Anything by Mel brooks, Anything with Peter Sellers, the first Alien movie, The Shining (w/ Jack Nicholson, of course), and What’s Eating Gilbert Grape. No, I don’t know why.
T.V. Shows
Someday, I will invest in a color TV. Maybe even HD. That would really bring my Betamax to life. Until then, I can get 1 and 1/2 stations in living monochrome, as long as I tape the tinfoil to the rabbit ears and wrap it around the doorknob. Needless to say, I don’t watch much TV. Family guy is pretty funny, though.
Paul’s Market in Kuna, Savers, Denny’s Lounge in
What are your hobbies?
Photography, my radio job, slammin’ on the ol’ guitar, and lawn tractor racin’. Well, I haven’t actually ever raced lawn tractors yet, but I aspire to. That should count, right?
Favorite tall building?
The NORAD headquarters would be my pick because it’s an awesome building. It’s an architectural marvel, in fact. Too bad you can’t see it though. It’s hidden inside a mountain for security reasons. What can you do?
What where you doing on August 12th, 2004?
Trying to find my pants. Never did find ‘em.
In the event that the world goes into an apocalyptic melt down, how do you plan to survive?
Hmmm… I don’t know for sure. But I’ll bet I’ll eat a lot of canned meat and shoot a lot of guns. Chances are, I won’t shower much.
Was Jules Verne a time traveler or just very intuitive about the future?
If Jules Verne were really a time traveler from the future, he would have been far more computer savvy.
And finally:
Chuck Norris or Keith Hernandez? Explain.
Chuck Norris. I have no explanation, other than to say I am being forced to pick Chuck Norris at gunpoint right now by a masked kung fu ninja traffic flagger in an orange reflective safety vest. Damn it.
